I'll take LANGUAGE for $1000, Alex.

Today, I signed up for a car wash at work (my work has a car washing service come every month for us) and I went outside to get the car washer's attention, so I yelled, "hi sir!", and waited for him to acknowledge me with a response, but to my surprise and horror he just stood there staring at me like I had a massive white zit on my nose, causing such a distraction  that it caused a lapse in what I thought was going to be a simple exchange. As I become flush with embarrasment, he points to his ears and mouths the word, "deaf!"

Oooooh!! Okay, so I don't have a bulbous goiter on my face, but somehow I feel even more like a creep and I just want to get out of there because I don't know how to communicate with a deaf person! But I have to try to tell him where my car is if I want a carwash. I start to pity him a little and trick myself into thinking what a great person I can be if only I use a little patience and understanding. So, I rattle my keys up in the air (how cliche!) and point to my car and slowly mouth, "white". He tries to ask if I'm on the sign-up sheet, but all I can do is stand there dumbfounded. He then brings me the sign-up sheet so I can point to my name and then I stupidly give him a thumbs up. A THUMBS UP?! He is not a child! GOD, I am such a dolt! Then he tries asking me something...I have no idea what he is saying because I thought he knew all he needed to know! Something about my lunch break? So I just offer a few animated nods and smile a very loud smile...because, let's face it, I have to make up for not speaking, right?! He is probably so sick of reactions like mine. I would have been so much cooler if I would have busted out some sign language! BAM!

Obamicon

You can do it too! Click here: Obamiconme

(Thanks Rach, again!)

Fox News is Awesome

Listen closely - Umm, ouch?! Better choose your words more wisely Fox News!


(Thanks Rachel!)

To Sir With Love

The New York Times posted an article about young children's thoughts, hopes and advice to President Obama. Here is the link to the entire article - Dear Sir Obama: Presidential Advice - you should read through their letters, especially if you need a good giggle! I have included my favorite letter here:

(thanks Rachel!)

44th President

With hope and virtue, let us brave once more the icy currents, and endure what storms may come.

Barack Obama 01.20.09

My Sun My Flower My Friend

Two things that make me smile:

Fact or Fiction?

Fact or Fiction from Scientific American

1. Waking Sleepwalkers May Kill Them.
Just how big a hazard is it? The chances of killing a sleepwalker due to the shock of sudden awakening is about as likely as someone expiring from a dream about dying. In fact, waking a sleepwalker is more likely to save his or her life.
The answer: Fiction.

2. Living People Outnumber the Dead.
Has the human population swelled so much that people alive today outnumber all those who have ever lived? Despite a worldwide quadrupling of the population in the past century, the number of people alive today is still dwarfed by the number of people who have ever lived whether we begin counting from the first Homo sapiens 50,000 years ago, the Egyptian agricultural revolution in 9,000 B.C., or the Roman rule in 1 A.D.
The answer: Fiction.

3. Chocolate is Poisonous to Dogs.
Can too many M&M's kill a Chihuahua? Humans and their pets share a similar sweet tooth, but whereas humans who eat chocolate feel a slight euphoria, our canine companions that do so may suffer - theobromine and caffeine components in the candy can poison and even kill them. Choclate's real danger to dogs, however, mostly depends on the quality and quantity consumed and the size of the dog.
The answer: Fact.

4. Vitamin Supplements Improve Your Health.
Americans pour billions of dollars into supplements every year. Is it an investment in health -or money down the drain? Humans need 13 vitamins to survive but excess intake of certain supplements can be harmful. The best way to get most of your micronutrients is to eat healthful foods (fruits and vegetables) because they include thousands of other phytochemicals that have additional protective benefits to the body: they maintain vitamins' chemical integrity and assist in their digestion.
The answer: Fiction.

5. Underwire Bras Cause Cancer.
Is your bra killing you? It is unknown what exactly causes breast cancer, but bras, or the lack thereof, are not the secret answer. Risk factors include age, gene mutation, and there is an increased risk for women who give birth after 30.
The answer: Fiction.

6. Archimedes Coined the Term "Eureka!" in the Bath.
The famed mathematician made many important scientific contributions. Was this exclamation the result of one of them? According to lore, while taking a bath Archimedes discovered that the water his body displaced was an exact measure of his volume - thus his exclamation "Eureka," or "I've found it." Several millenia later, this exclamation is ubiquitous. The first mention of the story, however, was by Vitruvius, a Roman writer, 200 years after the event.
The answer: Fiction.

7. Vodka Keeps Cut Flowers Fresh.
Does vodka really dull flowers' senses and inhibit their aging process? If small amounts are added, vodka works as a flower preservative by interfering with the plant's ripening process.
The answer. Fact.